03. i only want to be with you

Monday, April 10, 2006 @ 4:49 AM

ppl i hav moved... to my old blog...
http://buzzbuzzme.blogspot.com...

the only one i want.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006 @ 7:51 AM

todae ... i was afarid... i didnt believe in myself... yesterdae when i ask u whether it is true... u sae no... it kinda ease my confusion... but i was still scared... i didnt hav confidence in myself... so i was like tryin to avoid in seeing u... or else i dun noe wad to sae... while goin down to the canteen i saw u... but i didnt noe y i didnt walk towards u... but im still havin thoughts of stuff tat i dun really wan to think too... so wad if u like me... but ure frens doesnt... its still a bit hard rite... proberly u dun see it... but i can... i dun wanna act as if nth has happen... but i hav too... smiling at stuff... looking happy... coz i dun wan to give u any troubles... i dun wan to be ure burden... i noe u hav ure problems already... i dun wan to add in it... hope our relationship can get better as time pass... hope we get closer... understand each other more... i feel as if i dun really noe u... haizx... arh!!! fridae hav 2.4... sure die de... my stomach not very well... walk oso the right side the bone there will like pain... haizx... wonder how to run... haizx... sure die half way... hmm... tml got one hour of pe... wonder wad we will be doin... coz mrs tay sae we dun need to run already... so YAY!!!... haha... i scared i cannot pass incline-pull-up... this time must do 3 to pass... haizx... last time only one... ONE!!! ONE LOR... NOW 3... 2 MORE DIFFERENCE LOR... SURE DIE... im like so super lazy... haizx... wanna sleep already... when i took a bout 2 hours nap just now... haha... hmm... i should like go off now... haha... bye...

the only one i want.

Monday, April 03, 2006 @ 6:24 AM

i really wan to noe wads goin on... i heard lots of stuff... i dun noe whether it is true anot... of course i wish they are not true... but it seems so true... if it is true... i really cant imagine it... i cant imagine tat u can actually do this... or should i sae im numb to everything... or im force to pretend tat nth has happen... wrong i should sae... tat everything is true... truth tat i dun wish is true... i might well wish i had been rejected right from the start... it is better than now... i dun noe wad u wan... i dun noe wad u thinking about... i just dun hope that all tat i heard is true... but if i think tat way... im just deciving myself... totally cheating myself... i dun wan to hear stuff... dun wan to see anymore things... i dun wan to noe wads goin on anymore... i just wan to carry on lieing to myself... n wad... act happy in school everydae... pretend nth has happen... even if the worse has come... still look happy... smile everytime... everydae... make ppl laugh n happy... even though im hurting like hell inside... but so wad... it is nice... to be hurt... i might well not be loved... coz it hurts... so wad for be loved when u will still get hurt... so might as well just get hurt but not loved... it is better isnt it... i dun noe wad im goin to do next... i really dun noe... forget bout everything... pretend very thick skin... go school as if nth has happen... i dun noe... but i noe one thing... i dun wan to cry to sleep... my eye hurts... n i still wanna wear contects... after cryin i cant wear contects the next dae... but who cares... i dun care already... i care for ppl more than myself... wad more u wan me to do... i dun noe...

the only one i want.

Sunday, April 02, 2006 @ 8:12 AM

until now than i now that i hav hurt u badly... now than i now how much it has hurt... im sorry... i oso noe how u hav felt last time... i understand u now... but it seems too late... proberly ive made the wrong choice right frm the start... ive always been wrong... i only think bout myself... not bout others... i seriously dun noe wad im doin already... i dun wan to noe too... i just wan to find myself again... but i seem so lost... tat i dun wan to find the exit anymore... or i dun wan to find the proper me... it seem lost in a dark hole... nv can be found... nv wanted to be found... it may be staying deep in my heart forever... but does it matter i dun think so... nth matters... not anymore... im still living life... just the wrong way... but i dun care... i dun wanna care... not anymore... it doesnt matter... nth matters... i dun wan care anymore... coz nth will change... so wad for... wad for waste the time n efford... just leave things as they r... untouched...

the only one i want.

Saturday, April 01, 2006 @ 7:42 AM

IM TIRED OF EVERYTHING... SINCE U DUN CARE... I CANT BE BOTHERED TOO...

the only one i want.

Thursday, March 30, 2006 @ 6:35 AM

harlo... i dun noe whether i should be in a gd mood anot... haha... i mad todae... i drank before i went for morning runs... than after tat had e maths... than pe... one hour of pe... ran 2.4km... stomach hurts like hell lar... must i ren... n passed... got a C too... mon trying to aim higher... yay!!! i must try aim for B or A for 2.4km... of course i wont drink n rn again... haha... feels horrible... lol... drank todae coz i forgot tat we r goin to run 2.4 during pe... but i still make it... woo hoo... kinda proud.. haha... coz while runing had stiches... n felt like puking... was feeling so horrible... haha... felt as if i was goin to die... haha... but i didnt... didnt mangae to see u todae... sort of did see u... but u didnt... just hope i wont feel disappointed tml... or i really dun noe how u feel... or wadever u said is just lies... nth but lies... or wad... u dun hav the sincerity... than forget it... i understand already... anyway... got lots of hw to do... gtg...

the only one i want.

Wednesday, March 29, 2006 @ 6:44 AM

wad is life about...??? living dae by dae... dun noe wad will happen next... no plan for ure life... proberly tats my life... or should i sae i dun even hav a life... i dun noe wad i wanna be... or i noe... i wan to be a ghost... wandering around... being dead... isnt i better... better for everyone too... better for me... ive think i hav been living in confusion... i dun noe wads right anymore...just wanna do wrong stuff... to be happy or wadever... i dun noe... proberly just to try out new stuff... im emotionally addicted... not physically addicted... without it i wont die... my i just so wan to do it to pleased myself... pleased my own heart... nth is wrong to me... nth anymore... it doesnt matter anymore... not anymore... maybe my heart hav turned into stone... but when i see u it melts... but when i dun... it turns to stone again... i dun noe wads the prob with us... i feel as if i dun understand u.. there is like a communication break down... or perhaps u dun even wan to hav it... im tired... i think... really tired... just wanna disappear... disappear frm this whole... i dun wan to exsits...

the only one i want.